Selasa, 27 Januari 2009

Some Classic Definitions


Some really cool definitions, which i had got on mail. Go through them and tell me ur favorites. :)

1. Cigarette : A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end & a fool at the other.


2. Love affairs : Something like cricket where one day internationals are more popular than a five day test.


3. Marriage : It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her master.


4. Divorce : Future tense of marriage.


5. Lecture : An art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of the students without passing out.


6. Conference : The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.


7. Compromise : The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.


8. Tears : The hydraulic force by which masculine will power is defeated by feminine water power.


9. Dictionary : A place where divorce comes before marriage.


10. Conference Room : A place where everybody talks, nobody listens & everybody disagrees later on.


11. Ecstasy : A feeling when you feel you are going to feel a feeling you have never felt before.


12. Classic : A book which people praise, but do not read.


13. Smile : A curve that can set a lot of things straight.


14. Office : A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.


15. Yawn : The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.


16. Etc. : A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.


17. Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually!


18. Experience : The name men give to their mistakes.


19. Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions.


20. Diplomat : A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.


21. Opportunist : A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally falls into a river.


22. Optimist : A person who while falling from Eiffel Tower says midway "see I am not injured yet."


23. Pessimist : A person who says that O is the last letter in ZERO, Instead of the first letter in word OPPORTUNITY.


24. Boss : Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.


25. Politician : One who shakes your hand before elections and your confidence after.


26. Doctor : A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with his bills.

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